Best. News. Ever.

I FINALLY got a job as a psychiatric nurse!!!!!  I went into nursing school knowing all I wanted to do was psych nursing and graduated with the same passion.  I refused to accept anything other than what I knew I wanted to specialize in and after 8 long years of constant rejection, I am finally victorious!

This will, of course, mean a HUGE change for our family.  I haven’t worked since I got married and not by choice but by sheer circumstance.  After orientation, a nurse works three 12-hour days a week so Owen will go into daycare at the same school that William and Colin attend for those three days (if all three fall during Mon-Fri, which is unlikely) and David has been allowed to modify his schedule enough to drop them off and pick them up on those days.

There is so much more to this change than just family logistics.  I think this will be a massive benefit on a number of different levels.  Aside from the financial boost, I have been in desperate need of a calling outside the home.

Do I love being a mom?  Yes.

Do I love being a stay-at-home mom?  Not so much.

In the beginning, I thought being a stay-at-home mom would make all my dreams come true.  I loved the idea of it and of being married and imagined it would bring me complete fulfilment.  But this has not been the case.  I have found staying home brings me much more frustration than happiness.  Answering this call for something else has meant a huge shift in my perspective about being a wife and a mother.  I WISH I was fulfilled by staying home.  I so desperately wished for this.  But when you come face to face with the fact that you are deeply unfulfilled, it calls for action.  I examined my own belief systems surrounding family and when it turned out my heart was leading me to a different truth, it got to the point I could no longer ignore it.  That’s the tough thing about belief systems – they are built on years upon years of ideas about the way you think things ought to be instead of the way your own path may be calling you.  And when you find your belief system is very different than your life experience, it’s a terrifying confrontation. So I consider this a time of redefining myself, my family, and the very first step of finding my purpose.  Who knows where this job will lead.  Hopefully to higher places, to more education (getting my master’s is on my radar), and ultimately more fulfilment.